Tomorrow is my Little Man's 7 birthday.
I have lived with him for most of those 7 years. I have seen him discover the world and through his eyes have rediscovered some of it myself.
It is amazing to me that kids will make us look anew at things that we take for granted and see every day, but to them it is all new and wonderful. Sometimes terrible too. To see the wonder though is renewing and I feel like a kid again too.
At the same time, I am scared at how he will take my dying. He knows that I am truly and terribly sick. I do not believe that he does realize what death is. He has seen pets pass and dead squirrels of course, but not one that he loves and part of his family that has died. And it breaks my heart that I will have to be the one to give him that experience.
For the time being of course we will celebrate his birthday and lavish him with love tomorrow so that we all can be happy and share that happiness with each other.
I love you Little Man and I always will. Have a good life, and when you think of me, I hope you remember the times we fished, and "hunted" together. The times we laughed until we were silly. The times we teased your Nana. The times Bigfoot left you notes and watched over you while you slept. The times we had snuggled in my chair and watching the same shows for the thousandth time while you tell me what will happen next.
I love you Little Man so very much.
Until next time..............
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